How to Not Enable Your Son

How to Not Enable Your Son

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Written by: Ryan Butler, Director of Family Services at Embark Recovery.

Many times, when families are confronted with their son’s drug and/or alcohol use, the family can unintentionally become detrimental to their son’s success in recovery through no fault of their own. As humans we behave and act according to what we’ve been taught throughout the course of our lives. The purpose of this blog post is to suggest approaches for those in need of direction with their loved one.

The biggest and most prominent issue that can arise is when the family is in denial about their son’s drug and alcohol problem. Having an open and honest discussion as a family is typically the first step in getting your son help for his issues. It is always a good idea to suggest that there is an issue regarding their drug and alcohol use before insisting that there is one. Each family member should share their own feelings and thoughts surrounding the situation, while not shaming or pushing guilt onto the person with the issue. Each family member should tell their loved one what they will and will not help with in their situation, and then follow through with those actions. Many times, the family should cut their loved one off financially (including providing a house and meals) unless the loved one has agreed to seek professional help.

Enabling can also take its toll on each family member, especially when the family tries to help their son control his use and/or the situation in general. This is part of why addiction is considered a family disease and can affect an entire household. Becoming an active participant of support groups is a great idea for families to become informed about this disease and to get suggestive approaches to their son. Some of these groups include Al-Anon, Nar-Anon, Families Anonymous, and PAL Groups.

An informed family is a family that can help work cohesively to help their son overcome their addiction and work on their own recovery. For more resources please visit our Links page or call Embark Recovery at 877.215.2224 today!                 

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